Apparently, it's the season of wedding bells. At least, that's where all the talk seems to be heading. One after another, friends are either getting engaged or are in the midst of planning for their big day. The numbers are upping.
Honestly, it's overwhelming.
Don't get me wrong, I'm absolutely happy for them - at least, those to matter to me. I'm even excited for some! At the same time, the pressure rests upon my shadows. I'm not even close to getting there yet.
Besides the fact that both the boyfriend-of-6-years and I have barely touched the first step on the career ladder and can even barely support ourselves yet; I have a whole different perspective on marriage - which many wouldn't agree. I view marriage as more than a piece of contract paper and it can't solely be based on the delusions of fantasy love. It's not something you rush into, just because everyone else is doing it; nor the fact that you just want to prove a point to somebody by getting hitched, or even just doing it for the sake of retaliation. That's just wrong.
Marriage isn't always the happy endings you get from fairy tales; it requires both effort and commitment from both partners to actually make it work. Its more than just puppy love. It's 1 Corinthians 13. You don't just get married end of story and file for divorce if it doesn't work out. Under most circumstances, divorce shouldn't even be an option.
Forgive me, if I've offended any of you, but this is just my firm set of belief.
As far as matrimony is concerned, I'm a fuddy-duddy. Which is why, whenever I'm asked 'When's your turn?' or 'Don't you think it's about time?'; time and time again, I replied, 'not anytime soon'. And that's the truth. Not until we're financially capable of supporting ourselves, and not until I grasp the true meaning of 'till death do we part'.
Well, God willing, if/when it happens, then it'll be a beach wedding with lots of sunshine and blue skies. I promise I won't be Bridezilla. ;)
Disclaimer: This post is not meant for anyone in particular. It was just a spur of the moment thought what with most of my friends preparing to tie the knot. My personal view on the subject, you don't have to agree with me. Above all, I'm sincerely happy to see a few of my close friends moving into this season - after working so hard on everything. Cheers to you, loves!
3 comments:
i'm with you on a lot of your comments. we aren't getting married because everyone else is. we're getting married because we rely on each other for support, love, and sometimes, a little challenge. i don't see divorce as an easy option for us. if we ever get to that point, i will do everything i can to save our relationship, also realizing that sometimes divorce is the best thing for both parties, even if it may not be ideal. i hope you can find a secure job for both of you, i think it makes relationships easier to work through when money is not an issue.
thanks for your encouraging comments! i agree with your view too. every marriage is its own story and i would be excited when the time is right or when we're ready for it. i wish you the best!
ps - you've got a great blog! love the layout and the content. :)
I share your sentiments about marriage. I get that "it's about time" comments a lot too - since I have been seeing the same guy for the past 7 years. We aren't married yet for similar reasons, as we have just started our careers and there is just a lot to save up for the marriage : from the wedding reception to getting a house and everything inside it. But what is more important, I realized that through all these waiting, planning and saving: in it I find that I am so blessed to just have a guy who loves me enough to wait, to save and to plan. And because marriage is a lifetime thing (divorce is not an option at all for me), these are the first process that somehow welds the relationship to be more solid for the marriage.
In His perfect timing, it will all be beautiful :)
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